March Horoscopes

Mira Clayborn and Catherine Omer

Aries (March 21- April 19): After school one day you were walking around in a field. As you reach down you see that there are clovers on the ground. After some further investigation you see that most of the ground is covered in clovers. After looking for about an hour you found a four leaf clover! For the rest of the year you had great luck!


Taurus (April 20- May 20): You are getting ready to go to a coffee shop with your friends. You finally get to the shop and sit down with your friends when someone sits down behind you. He has glasses on and a big hat so you can’t see his face. You get a closer look and realize that it’s your favorite musician from your favorite boy band! You ask him for a photograph and he signs one, but he also sneaks in tickets?! You wonder why and ask him if it was an accident, but he says you should come. You come to the sold out concert and sit front row. You have so much fun watching your favorite band. 


Gemini (May 21- June 20): On St. Patrick’s Day you are bored and decide to go hunting for a rainbow. While walking around your neighborhood you see a trail of gold glitter. You follow it around the town and out to a river. Once you get to the river you have a hard time seeing the gold. After starting into the river you see the gold continue. After walking along the river for a long time you see a glowing tiny green guy jumping up and down. You notice it’s a leprechaun! He leads you to the end of a rainbow and there is a pot of gold!


Cancer (June 21- July 22): You are on a hike during a warm March morning. You finally get to your destination on top of this big mountain. Legend has it that Leprechauns used to live on top of it. You sit down to eat your breakfast on a rock, but you fall through it?! Yoru are transported into an alternate universe with flying cars and huge buildings! After walking around for a little and not finding another portal you realize you are stuck and will have to live here forever!


Leo (July 23- August 22): After a long day at school you crash on your bed to take a nap. Almost instantly you fall asleep and have a wonderful dream about becoming famous. It started by getting a bunch of likes on a recent Instagram post. It progressed into you becoming the most famous influencer ever. “Wow!” you thought as your eyes snapped open, “That was amazing too bad it’s not real.” The next day you start to notice an increase in your followers on instagram and more people liking your posts. You realize your dream is coming true!


Virgo (August 23- September 22): You wake up all in haze. You can’ t remember everything that happened. You get out of your bed and walk outside, but instead of your normal neighborhood street, you see a red brick road with a goal! Leprechauns are walking their unicorns while they munch on chocolate. Another one goes by riding a rainbow cloud like car. What is happening?! This is not your normal sleepy town. Then a leprechaun approaches you and says welcome to your new home! You start to piece the puzzle together and find out that you were kidnapped by leprechauns?! What a ride.


Libra (September 23- October 22): Late one rainy afternoon you looked out the window and saw a beautiful rainbow not far away! You ran to it and on the ground by the end you saw a tiny green man. A leprechaun! You bent down to talk to him and he said “Congratulations on making it to the end of the rainbow! This one doesn’t have gold but I can show you something better, follow me!” He started to walk up the rainbow and confused you tried to follow him but only succeeded in walking through it. “Oh right”, he said “you’re human”. He sprinkled some magic dust on you and you were able to walk up the rainbow! When you got to the top he shouted “OK, now slide down!” You followed his orders and slid down the rainbow whooping and hollering the whole way! What a fun day!


Scorpio (October 23- November 21): You jolt awake to a tornado warning. Everyone is screaming outside and people are running everywhere. You put on a jacket and look downstairs only to see your family gone. You start running down the street to your neighbor’s tornado bunker, but you start to see your feet pick up off the ground. You look behind and realise the tornado is right behind you! It sweeps you away. You then fall into unconsciousness only to wake up somewhere else, but it’ s weird. There’s a yellow brick road with green pastures everywhere. You come across a fairy, a tinman, a lion, and a tiny dog…


Sagittarius (November 22- December 21): You are in a Zoom class when all of the sudden your camera turns on. There you are – like a deer in headlights. You’re still in your pajamas eating cereal with bedhead hair. Even the teacher looks at you a little weird. You then randomly start yelling “nonononoooo”. Your camera won’t turn off and everybody starts laughing. You’re horrified, until you jolt awake. 


Capricorn (December 22- January 19): Over spring break you were super bored and on your phone for the entire week. On the last day you were watching Netflix (as always, the new show you found was amazing!) when your phone started vibrating a lot. It shook and shook and after a loud crack arms and legs shot out from the sides. It shook itself off and stood up next to your bed. Confused, you asked what happened. Your phone replied with “Well since you have been on your phone so much I decided to make things more interesting!” “Oh my gosh!”, you thought, “your phone can talk?! What is going on?” For the last day of spring break you and your new phone friend did everything together!


Aquarius (January 20- February 18): You are strolling through the streets of Paris. Everything is amazing! You have your dream job and an amazing apartment. You just love your life and you can’t believe it. You decided one day to visit the Eiffel Tower and go all the way up! It’s crazy tall. All of the sudden the elevator stops working and you don’t know why. Nobody can hear you all the way up here. You’re stuck and unsure what to do until you find a parachute?! As your last resort, you take the parachute and jump off the top. Everybody is gasping. What are you doing! You count to three and jump. The next time you open your eyes you’re on the ground safely. I don’t think too many people can say they parachuted off the Eiffel Tower.

Pisces (February 19- March 20): One sunny spring morning you were out on a walk through the neighborhood. You stopped to smell some beautiful roses. As you bent down to sniff them glitter started appearing around you and your vision started to spin. You were lifted off your feet and dove head first into the rose! You landed hard on the ground and looked around, dazed. You saw beautiful lakes, flowers, mountains, vines – it looked like a fairy wonderland. And wait! What are those tiny things flying around, fairies?! You were in a fairy wonderland!