Lying.

Deceiving.

That is all I ever do.

My lies,

Consist of me telling myself that I am ok, that I will be ok.

When I tell my friends that I am ok, 

Even though I’m not.

Those are all lies.

My deception,

Consists of my smiling, pretending to be ok,

Even when my heart feels like it is ingesting itself.

Smiling every day,

Even though there is a civil war inside of me.

Lying, deceiving,

That is all I ever do,

To disguise the civil war raging inside of me.